Craving what’s Real this Holiday Season
Last week I ventured into the world to shop for my daughter.
I wanted to choose with my hands in real time the clothes that will keep her warm and express her heart in coming months.
The dross was overwhelming.
Every store was over-filled with the same things. Poorly made, quickly created, afterthoughts. So much slop I couldn’t see any of it.
Bright colors screaming: “Buy ME! You know you need something, just get me and move on”
I was able to find a few things I think my daughter will like (who knows with a 17 year old). But I came home feeling gross. The entire display seemed so thoughtless, soulless. A performance of “holiday magic” fabricated to disguise the consumerism machine underneath. That mechanism was showing through every poorly folded garment, bored shop girl, and towering display.
I don’t want to participate anymore.
In recent years I’ve written about honoring your values. And I’ve written about comfort. I’ve written about giving and receiving. In years past those all felt like true ways to work with the demands of the season.
The Real Season
This year I find I want to work with the season less and less. With the commercial season, that is.
This year I want to work with the real season underneath.
I want to be in the darkness and the quiet.
I want what’s real, even when it’s difficult.
I want handmade, home-cooked, human-written
I want thoughtful, intentional, considered.
I want slow, still, real.
This year, we’re still keeping traditions. We’ve bought lovely gifts for our children and each other. My parents will come. We will gather with family across several days.
Close to What’s Important
And, this year I’m staying closer to what’s real. I’m intentionally teaching a few extra classes, not because I have tons of free time, but because it puts us in the room together. It puts us in the place where we breathe and move without any need for window dressings. I’ve got a crochet project I can pick up anywhere, anytime. It’ll fill my hands when I want to mindlessly reach for my phone. I’m writing by hand before I type. No AI generated content here.
I’m writing even knowing that everything I write in these notes is now read by computers in China (I can see them by looking on the back end of my website) Everything I write is absorbed by machines so that they can learn to write like me. So one day in the near future, what… they replace me? I don’t know.
I’m Still Real
What I do know is that the machines will never have my heart. They’ll never have my awareness. They’ll never have my experiences. They don’t know the way the wind blows through my hair, or how the moon pulls the inner waters my soul. So they can’t ever possibly be me.
The dross hasn’t swallowed me yet. And when I look to the natural world I see she’s still spinning. Winter arrives this weekend, bringing the light back into our lives. Perhaps that’s what we’re all craving the most - a return to the real by reconnecting with nature. A return of the light by reconnecting with the light in my heart and yours.
I know it’s possible, even with all the everything. So there’s where the holiday is landing me. A turning away from the overdone and under considered. And a turning towards connecting, love, and the real, stark as it may be.
Moments of Real
Where does the holiday season land for you at this moment?
If your heart’s craving the same sensibilities that mine is… here are some things you might try:
Sit outside for the sunrise on the solstice (or any day) then tel someone about it.
Cook Something
Make Something
Write something
Put down your phone
Invite someone for coffee or tea
Practice Something Do it alone or with another
Linger
Savor
REST
I hope you’ll find your reprieve somewhere in there.
This is my last writing for 2025. So, I’m wishing you peace and ease for the next few weeks. I look forward to continuing together in 2026.
f